WILD CHILD: Safety Game

Risky play and outdoor adventures can be nerve wracking as the parent. How do I walk the line between letting my children explore and ensuring they stop in dangerous situations?  A game accidentally became my sanity-saving tool, and lets my children prove they can handle my trust.

The game is simple Red Light, Green Light. I say “Red Light”, you freeze.  I say “Green Light”, you run. Of course we have added our own variations over the years. Purple light – spin in circles, orange light – run back for a high five, etc. But what started as a way to keep the children close on walks when they were toddlers, has morphed into my most used parenting phrase. If I say “Red Light”, my children know to freeze. “Red Light” means there is danger, and I need them to stop immediately. Because it is different than words children hear so often, “no”, “stop”, “wait”, it warns them that I need immediate attention. This tool gives me peace of mind letting them stretch their boundaries, climb a little higher, and splash a little deeper. I know I can get them to stop immediately.

What happens when “Red Light” doesn’t work? The circle of responsibility they had earned shrinks. If I can’t trust them to stop immediately, they need to stay within my ability to stop them physically. Once they show responsibility within that smaller circle of freedom, they earn back their lost freedom. They rarely forget anymore, because nothing motivates a child as much as the chance to be independent and explore the thrilling and exciting world of risky play without being right next to an adult.

And the game? We still play it on our family walks, although the actions have gotten sillier over time.

Written by Tandy Morton, WILD CHILD Program Facilitator